Infatuation and lust are the words for today. That, and lazy and stupid. Lets start with one set.

First, I'm once again lost for a girl that I can never have. I think about her constantly and want to be with her constantly, but I can't. It can never be and it crushes me. I'm so lonely, I'm so lonely, and I can't seem to find any relief. I don't know what to do. I'm ready to break down into tears about this. I can't do this any more. I can't just stay here and be completely lonely. Something needs to change, and I pray that it is soon. Please help me find something.

Second, the kids are all so damn lazy and stupid. I can't believe this any more. I'm incredibly frustrated with all of them, but I don't know what to do. How can I feel this way? I'm frustrated with the powers that be, I'm frustrated with drama for next year, I just don't know what to do. Hopefully some distance will give me some perspective. But I don't think I'll last more than one more year. They anger me constantly. I can't chew butt, I can't motivate them, they don't want my help and they wont be successful in the future. These are the kids that need me the most, but these kids won't let me help them. I don't know what to do.

I'm thinking about getting out of teaching.
I need someone in my life.
I'm so lonely.

Need perspective.
Need compassion.
Need rest.

later.